美华文学主页
在线情况
1
  • 头像
  • 艾华
  • 级别
    • 职务区版主
    • 财富10
    • 积分486500
    • 经验202651
    • 文章1614
    • 注册2004-11-27
    Baolin, a very sensual and tasteful poem. Two minor points:
    1. The reference to the "Grenn Light" led me to fathom you and she were in the same car, with one driving (probably you) and the other, being a passenger.  But then your reference to a "desk" seems to repudiate that guess.  A bit confusing there.  You may want to clear it up.

    2."Allows my eyes
    To stay there longer decently"
    Wouldn't "steadily" be better than "longer decently"?
    The situation presents itself to you.  You just happened to be at the "wrong" place at the "wrong" time.  In my view, there's nothing indecent about it.   :-D


    美华文学论坛感谢您的参与
    在线情况
    2
    • 头像
    • 艾华
    • 级别
      • 职务区版主
      • 财富10
      • 积分486500
      • 经验202651
      • 文章1614
      • 注册2004-11-27
      Baolin, thank you for enlightening us! Please keep sending your great work this way, wouldn't y'a?
      美华文学论坛感谢您的参与
      在线情况
      3
      • 头像
      • 艾华
      • 级别
        • 职务区版主
        • 财富10
        • 积分486500
        • 经验202651
        • 文章1614
        • 注册2004-11-27
        Shashi, you're being very modest! Any English works to share with us here?
        美华文学论坛感谢您的参与
        loading...
        loading...
        loading...
        loading...
        loading...
        loading...
        loading...
        回复帖子 注意: *为必填项
        *验证信息 用户名 密码 注册新用户
        *帖子名称
        内容(最大25K)




        其它选项 Alt+S快速提交
         


        Powered by LeadBBS 9.2 .
        Page created in 0.2500 seconds with 10 queries.